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[25 Feb 2003|10:35pm] |
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It snowed pretty heavily last night. I didnt go to work today. I've been painting more, writing too. Im getting better and faster at everything. I still feel like shit though. I want more out of life.
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[27 Apr 2002|01:13am] |
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I recorded one of my new songs last night. Its called "The beauty of Blood" It sounds alright for being done on a 4track. I went to the army/navy store today and got some new boots. Tommorow Im going work with 3 new people to try out for my band. One plays synthesizer and the other two play bass and drums. I really want an industrial sound to my music. Thats how I usually Imagine the stuff I write,but I just havent had the equiptment. Grauations coming up, Im really dreading it, not the no more school and stupid people part, but all the people coming from other states part. Like my Dad, he's a great guy and all, but he's one of those AA people who think theyve been inflicted with a drinking disease. So he constantly talks about and attributes the problems hes had in life to alcohol, which really annoys me after about 5 minutes of it. Then theres Uncle Tom. He was cool at one time, but something happened to him. Now he's a religous freak who probly goes to bed now praying for god to save my soul, wondering why Im so fucking weird. I wish I could just have them mail the diploma to me.
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[06 Mar 2002|08:58pm] |
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mood |
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 high |
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Been writing alot of songs lately. I dont really know If Ill use all of them for Cyanide Obsession. I wrote a cool one about Elizabeth Bathory, its pretty fucked up. I hung out with Joel last weekend before he left to go to the army. We hung out last sunday with these girls from UNT and I guess now he said hes gonnas marry this girl Kristen. Shes fuckin cool though so I wouldnt be to worried about that. As long as shes not Nova Mildred, the biggest cunt on earth. I hated her so much. I still do actually. Joel usually picks the biggest psycos he can find. I dont know why that is. Im supposed to get my digital recorder soon. No more fuckin adderollin. Shit. I broke a string on erics guitar. Fuck. Thats such a terrible thing that you say to me, say it one more time and you will bleed. Im gonna work on some new songs with david and brad during spring break. Hells yeah I havent really practiced with anyone but Eric in a long time. All together me and eric have about 50 or so songs including the ones joels done. I want to fuckin play shows again. Everything was going so great for awhile then all this crazy shit had to happen. Oh well fuck it.
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[18 Jan 2002|11:07pm] |
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mood |
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 happy |
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Went to work tonight. It pretty much sucked. I got to watch this chick cry all night because she sold some alcohol to an undercover cop, it was kinda cool just to watch just because now I know not to be like her. The penalty for thats worse than a DWI. That kind of shit makes me glad Im not stupid. Wrote some cool new song slash poems. I really dont know what they are. Rahhhhhhhhhhhh Im gonna watch this movie I got called Jeepers Creepers, I hope Its not lame. It sounds like It might be good though.
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[15 Jan 2002|04:21pm] |
Fuck this world and fuck this life.
Fuck the way you are.
Dont feel sad when you slit your wrist.
Dont be scared of the blood..
Just say this prayer until you die
" I adore you suicide"
Let it stab into your side
take one last breath.
Scream one more time
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[14 Jan 2002|09:46pm] |
through these wasted lies,
You see open eyes.
I dont think that I need this shit.
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[13 Jan 2002|09:13pm] |
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CUT, FUCK, STAB
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[11 Jan 2002|03:52pm] |
Gotta work till 9 tonight. Damn that sucks. Workin for the godfather. I shot life and it shot me, forever changed by your hate that I seemed to allow.
Please leave me alone today,
Then question, Question everything.
let your head spin till you drop.
Ill trick or treat Until you rot.
The clock strikes midnight in your head,
That time of day when your not dead,
Get back
Get down
Sigh
Suffocate.
I write these words with all my hate.
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[07 Jan 2002|04:51pm] |
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mood |
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high |
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I went to school today. Got my credit back. Lying can be so fun sometimes. I left after One class though cause I just didnt feel like being at school today. I went to J R pockets last night with jason and hung out with Tracy and her Boyfriend. I couldnt drink there other than that it was cool.
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[04 Jan 2002|01:09pm] |
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mood |
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amused |
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Hells yeah David found some good trip. Tonight should be cool
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[04 Jan 2002|11:35am] |
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mood |
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 determined |
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Im supposed to hang out with David tonight. Were gonna go to Jasons and somoke some Salvia and get drunk tonight. Oh so fun
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[03 Jan 2002|03:21pm] |
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[03 Jan 2002|03:17pm] |
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mood |
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 guilty |
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Shit!!! Im bored theres no one to talk to. Feel better Jess. I have to go to work tonight till nine. My jobs cool though, I just shoot the shit with Jason and Jarrod all night and smoke ciggarettes and make pizza every once in awhile. I cant wait till I get my tax returns Im gonna get this bad ass korg digital recorder so I can make some demos and shit for me and my band.
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[01 Jan 2002|03:37pm] |
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[01 Jan 2002|03:19pm] |
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[31 Dec 2001|11:26pm] |
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mood |
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amused |
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Im definately tripping now.
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[31 Dec 2001|10:44pm] |
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I just droped the shit. All by myself on newyears, tripping. Shit
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[27 Dec 2001|03:10pm] |
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mood |
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 gloomy |
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I got another fuckin tooth pulled. Im dizzy. Im nautious
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[25 Dec 2001|06:52am] |
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Its like 7 in the morning right now. Shit my family gets up early for christmas. I got some cool shit, a cd burner, music and stuff. Im just gonna get stoned all day because its christmas
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[24 Dec 2001|12:21pm] |
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mood |
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high |
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Hello again. I dont write alot for some reason.
I got my wisdom tooth pulled a couple of weeks ago.
I didnt hurt at all, plus I got a buch of lortab, so all
in all it was actually fun. My band hasnt really done
much lately. I think this band may actually turn into 2 or
three different bands which I dont mind because I'll be in
all of them. It's all because none of the other band members
seem to like each other but they all get along with me so
thats the only thing that will work. Oh well fuck it.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK it!
Hi jess, I miss talking to you.
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